Oh my goodness, how did I miss this message from the 3 of Wands the other day? I had one of my Tower moments while looking at the Ferret Tarot 3 of Wands. I need a team to help me achieve my goals. Look at how happy those Ferrets are – working together and triumphantly reaching their goals.

That has always been one of my biggest challenges – working with other people. Don’t get me wrong, I’m a fairly effective team player and I love helping other people out. But I don’t like asking for help. And that’s key to the reaching the success implied in the 3 of Wands. In order for my efforts to be successful and for the rewards of my actions to manifest, I may actually have to work with others and even ask for support. What a nightmare that is (well for me anyway). To actually admit I might need help with something or that I am weak in any area is anathema to me. I am Debbie; I am the oldest sibling; I am the smartest; I am perfect. If I’m all these things then how can I possibly need help?

Even as a child I had a very difficult time asking for assistance. As a result I probably did worse in math than was necessary. I had friends who would have willingly helped me but I stubbornly refused to ask. On a staff retreat we had to do an activity as a team and get all team members over a wall. I absolutely hated it. And when we processed it later I shared that I am find being a support for someone else – I’m strong, I can handle it. But having to rely on someone else to support me gives me shivers.

It’s not too hard to find the genesis of this attitude, it stems directly from my childhood. I’m not here to beat up my parents but the reality is that as the oldest child I was often expected to help with the younger siblings. I might have needed help myself but didn’t feel right asking for it because my parents were busy with the other kids. And sometimes even when I did ask, I didn’t get the help I desired. Or it might back backfire like the time I asked my father for help with a math equation and he made me memorize the multiplication tables. So I learned to do things on my own. I love helping others out (because that proves how “smart” I am). But to ask for assistance or support or help from others is very difficult.

I think these wonderfully wacky ferrets are trying to visually show me that I can’t reach the pinnacle I seek if I don’t have a solid foundation under me. And that foundation includes support from friends. Life is not a 50-yard dash, it's a relay race. So it's okay to pass my baton off to someone else or to take one from them. So to all my friends out there – expect phone calls or emails.