The number 3 symbolizes the generative force, creative power, multiplicity, and forward movement.  They are about planning and preparing, putting the details into place before beginning the work.  The suit of Swords is associated with reason, thought, logic, will, courage, verbal skill, matters pertaining to the mind, communication and the element of air.  It can represent getting all your plans and thoughts assembled in a coherent manner before presenting them to the public.  It's about deciding how to incorporate these plans and ideas into your current lifestyle.  The 3 of Swords can also indicate a conflict of the heart or a flash of insight that allows the seeker to perceive a situation for what it is.  Sometimes it suggests a sense of betrayal and heartbreak, something that our mind thought would come true has failed.  

In looking at these cards I was struck by two things, the first is that on the Touchstone 3 of Swords the regal looking woman is cradling the swords against her body.  She seems to be protecting them rather than being hurt by them.  She has a book open before her perhaps she is seeking new ideas and new information to incorporate into her plans and lifestyle.  On the Hero's Journey 3 of Swords there is a winged woman recoiling almost in pain at the reflections being shown to her in a mirror held by a skeleton.  Blood drips down her chest, as though she has been cut.  The sense I get from this card is that she has been forced to face a truth which is causing her serious pain but that will ultimately allow her to see the truth and move forward in a healthier and more positive manner.

So how does this reflect things in my life?  This card seems to be the next logical step for me after yesterday's 2 of Wands.  This card is reminding me that I need to face some truths about myself, about my life, about my ideas.  And once I do that then I can begin to plan, prepare and put my ideas into play.  I have an interesting habit of just sort of going forward without an action plan.  Creating an action plan has always seemed like such a waste of time and effort to me.  However,  I have also learned from hard experience that failure to plan and organize brings problems of its own.  Actually I have to say that old saw "those who fail to plan, plan to fail" tends to be very true.  And I'm tired of planning to fail.  I have spent more time and money taking workshops on time management and life management and whatever the hell else they are being called these days.  I bough the Franklin Covey add-on for Outlook and barely use it.  It's as though I realize deep inside that these tools would be very beneficial to me but I resist implementing them.  

I sometimes wonder if I'm afraid of unleashing my full potential.  I realize that sounds like some sort of infomercial seminar hyperbole but Ii often get the sense that there is so much untapped potential inside myself and I resist tapping it because I don't want to be any more "different" than I already am.  Like the regal woman guarding her three swords, I hold on to and hide my intellectual abilities and ideas because when I was younger it would often lead to teasing by other kids.  I was regularly told to "stop using those $1.00 words" or people would comment about what a "brainiac" I was.  I already felt different, somewhat like an outcast, because I just couldn't play the games others played.  Looking back I realize that I must've been a real killjoy as a child.  I remember once playing "Charlie's Angels" as a kid (I was always Jill Monroe) and when more people wanted to play my friend suggested that we just let them be the actresses real names.  But I got stubborn and suggested just adding other names because how could two people play the same character.  I eventually gave in (with a lot of ill grace) but I never gave up the concept.  It's still the same way.  If something doesn't make sense to me I just can shut up about it.  I keep at it like a pit bull with a bone.  Needless to say this does not endear me to people.

The 3 of Swords is forcing me to look at this tendency to downplay my assets (even I'm not arrogant enough to thing I'm perfect but I am confident enough to admit I've got assets).  And not just my intellectual ones.  Look back on my past and present I realize that I did the same thing with my body.  I couldn't handle the attention it attracted (I have genuinely met quite a few sexual predators and sickos in my time) so rather than continuing to deal with it I cover it up in layers of fat.  Even now I find it difficult to even start shedding that protective layer.  Only now it's become more of a liability than an asset because it's negatively impacting myself.  

So I think the message for me from the 3 of Swords is that I need to organize my thoughts and get my plans in order.  And once I can finally wrap my mind around some serious truths (about myself and others) then I'll be ready to move forward.  I can do it but I have to believe in myself and make some plans.  I need to plan to succeed for a change instead of just letting it be an unexpected benefit.