The number 3 symbolizes the generative force, creative power, multiplicity, and forward movement. They are about planning and preparing, putting the details into place before beginning the work. Pentacles are associated with the material world, acquisitions of wealth and possessions, our connection to Earth and Nature, sensation, matters pertaining to the physical plane, the body, health and physical or sexual activities. Pentacles can also be connected with practicality, groundedness and being realistic. The 3 of Pentacles represent sharpening professional ability; successful effort using creative and practical skills; and new undertakings that bring material rewards. In theory, I'm sure this card is trying to tell me that I need to focus on being more productive today; on getting some work done. In reality what I did most of the day was worry. It's really hard to focus on accomplishing specific job related tasks when you're worried that you'll be losing your job in a few weeks. Heck, who am I kidding, I'm not worried about it, I'm convinced it's coming. It's not like this will be the end of the world if it actually happens. However this would also not be the time I want to be looking for another job. I may be worrying about nothing but I don't think so. After Friday's email from the exec I'm not the only one feeling this way. The demoralization of staff at headquarters is palpable. I think about half of us feel our job is on the line. Of course one of the most ironic parts is that the terminations are based on positions being expendable. This means that some folks, who might not be performing up to par will keep their jobs because the position is fully funded by some government contract. Is it fair? No. Then again who ever said life was fair. Hmm, maybe another aspect of the 3 of Pentacles is to polish up my resume. It might be time to put some work and effort into that and into starting to look for another job. As I've mentioned several times before, whether I actually get laid off or not, this isn't the best place for me anymore. It's time to move on and hanging in there really isn't an option anymore. I'm always ready to fight the good fight but the fact is that this fight isn't worth winning anymore. Even if I am able to survive the first round of cuts, is this the place I want to devote my energies? Not anymore. It's not the same agency I remember as a child. It's not the same agency I started working for 14 years ago. It's not even the same agency it was 4 years ago. It has changed quite a bit and not necessarily for the better. At least in the past, as bad as things got we supported each other. Now there is an atmosphere of competitiveness and even back-stabbing. Then again maybe it really was always that way and I just never saw it before.