The Fool represents a sense of innocence and joy, a time in life when everything seems new and we have not preconceived notions to weigh us down. The Fool is like an innocent child just starting out on life's journey - a clean slate in search of new experiences. The Fool trusts in life and is unaware of limitations or restrictions. The Fool is a Major Arcana card but its number is 0. The Fool is often seen as symbolizing the Fool's journey or our soul's journey through life.  The Fool is all about trust and being willing to start anew and take a leap of faith. 

I love that the Fantastic Menagerie Fool is a lion.  We are so used to seeing a lion symbolizing Strength but I've never seen one used for The Fool.  It made me consider how strong someone must be to be truly "foolish"; to be willing to take those chances and make that leap of faith.  It's not physical strength that's necessary but strength of purpose, strength of conviction.  The true fool must have the strength to take the chance, and taking chances is not for the faint of heart. 

On the Olympus card we see an image of Dionysus, the divine fool.  He inspires us to take risks and to throw off the shackles of societal expectations and rules.  Dionysus leads his followers in a dance of madness and release, intoxicating them with freedom and no limitations.  That kind of freedom can be terrifying and liberating.  Humans usually seek guidelines and rules so that we know how to behave and what is expected of us.  When we chose to live "off the grid" we are exploring uncharted territory.  That requires a daring and bravery that few of us truly possess.  We may push against the rules and even define ourselves in opposition to the rules, but to truly live outside of the rules is altogether different.  That requires a true act of foolish faith.

Hmm, once again I think this ties in to some of the issues I've been trying to avoid lately.  The whole concept of taking  a leap of faith and starting anew is one I'm trying to put off as long as possible.  I just keep getting the sense that changes are coming whether I want them to or not, and all I"m doing is staving off the inevitable.

Of course as anyone who knows me can verify, I resist change with every fiber of my being.  I may eventually come to appreciate and value the change, but I will probably never actually seek it out.  I just don't trust that change is better or that things will improve as a result of the change.  In my experience the opposite tends to happen.  When change occurs I have often felt that things got worse, at least from my perspective.  When they built new apartment buildings in my neighborhood, residents thought it was wonderful.  What resulted was blocks of families moved into one high-rise; the remaining residents in the tenements were harassed out and the landlords converted the old tenements into co-ops or condos.  That completely changed the fabric of my neighborhood.

When the new executive director took over PAL there were promises that things would be different and better.  At first people believed in him and had hope.  Then we began to realize that it hadn't really changed.  There was still favoritism and unfair practices, the only change was the beneficiaries.  A new group was in favor now and benefited from these changes.  And in the long run, the agency is in much worse shape now than it was under the old regime.

I have to find a way to bring some trust and faith in the universe back into my life.  I think I've become to cynical for my own good.  All my life I've been an external cynic and an internal cock-eyed optimist.  I act like I'm prepared for the worst but I've always hoped for and believed the best would win out.  Over the past two years that has eroded.  I need to find that optimist again.  I truly do believe that we create our own realities and we drawn certain energies into our lives based on our mindset.  So if I keep focusing on the negative then that's what will keep manifesting in my life.  I don't want that.  I want to be happy, healthy and optimistic.  I want to feel Foolish again.