Traditionally Judgment represents a time of returning to the light after experiencing the darkness.  It is a card of rebirth, renewal and rejuvenation; of healing and transformation.  It can also be seen as a wake-up call telling us that our perspective on life is about to change and wake us up to new ways of looking at things.   It may represent experiencing natural growth and maturation; an old phase of your life ending because you are ready and mature enough to move forward.  Things are maturing at their natural pace and now you are transitioning into a new phase of your life so it's time to celebrate.

"Positive:  You are experiencing the joy of having things mature at their natural pace.  You know that you are moving into a new phase in your life and you're celebrating the transition.  You can trust that this natural maturation process is working out well for you.
Upright:  The events of your life are going through a phase change or maturing at their own pace.  Your relationship (or your wine or your child) has grown and matured and is now moving into a new age.  Things have progress naturally and now you can symbolize or ritualize the passage into the new phase." - Gail Fairfield

"Loss, stagnations, fear of change, ill health." - Paulina LWB

"The Metamorphosis of the Spirit - In the most profound recesses of our psyche sleep precious chrysalides waiting to be reawakened.  Let this change occur and acquire a more open and creative outlook of things." - Metamorphosis LWB

Hmm, the joy of things maturing.  That sounds interesting.  Of course in light of the day and the company I would have to apply this to my relationship with my family in general.  In the past my relationship with my sister and mother has been occasionally strained.  To say that I have tended to be judgmental of their choices, decisions and actions would be an understatement on my part.  I have no idea if they have been judgmental about mine for two reasons - I never asked and they tend to not tell me things like that.  For better or worse, I have somehow become the great authority in my family.  They have often claimed to be afraid to tell me things because of how I might react.  Ironically my reaction or lack thereof is worthless because they can't change what has already occurred and probably wouldn't even if they could.  In reality I think I am given much more power than I actually have in these relationships.

I am honest enough to admit that there is something in my psyche that would allow me to cut off contact with my family with minimal pain on my part.  I'm not saying it wouldn't hurt but I would show it.  And if I feel truly vindicated in this decision (such as the time I didn't speak to my sister for several months because she did not ask me to be my oldest nephew's godmother) then it is very easy for me to convince myself it doesn't matter.  It seems to cause me less pain when I withdraw from them, than it causes my sister and mother.  I don't count my brother in this because I honestly have no idea what he feels about these things.  I know what he says he feels but it doesn't always match his actions.

In time, my mother, sister and I have reached a place where we can have a good time with each other and let go of our judgments and attitudes.  It's not always successful - we still have our battles, but it does allow us to have some fun times together.  I do like my mother and sister and would probably have a great time with them even if they weren't my mother and sister.  What I have to do is separate that from the stuff that drives me crazy.  It can be very difficult for me to keep my mouth shut when someone is complaining about a situation in their life but takes no responsibility for having helped create it.  My mom and sister have a tendency to revel in martyrdom and victimhood and it drives me nuts. 

Today turned out to be a lot of fun.  Sandy and mom came up with Sandy's kids for Christmas dinner. Sandy made a really good lasagna, I made a pork roast, mashed potatoes and some veggies.  Once the food was done we took it over to the mom-in-law's house to eat.  I think the kids were a bit much for the mom-in-law but we all had fun.  The food was good and we laughed a lot.  Then we headed back to my house to watch the latest Family Guy take on Star Wars "Something, Something, Something Dark Side" (good but not as funny as Blue Harvest).  By then Jack had pretty much had enough with this sitting still crap and became a bit disruptive, but I can't say I blame him.  If I were five years old and there was snow outside I wouldn't want to be in the house either.  They left after the movie because mom had to be in work.  Overall I think we all had a great time.

After they left, hubby and I watched some television and had some snacks while we sat under the glow of the twinkling Christmas lights.  I love twinkling Christmas lights.  I may hate decorating and wrapping gifts but I do love the lights.

What I love even more is the fact that I have matured to the point where I can be with my sister and not spent the whole time judging various aspects of her life.  The reality is that it's her life, it's not my business.  I can be supportive and helpful sometimes but I can't make decisions for her.  No matter how much I might disagree with what she does and how she does it, it's her life.  She has to learn from her own mistakes and grow at her own pace.  It can be hard to accept that as the older sister there is nothing I can to protect her and keep her safe (which is really what this is all about), but that's how life goes.  It's a good thing I don't have kids - I can't imaging how much I'd smother them.