The number 5 represents that added something that brings the situation out of balance again.  It represents the struggle and challenge of inner and outer growth.  Cups are associated with emotions, love, pleasure in life; matters pertaining to the unconscious, intuition and the inner planes, and the element of water.   This card often symbolizes the need to let go of our emotional connection to something that has passed out of our lives. 

"Your feelings are in flux.  Everything that seemed emotionally sure, now feels as though it's changing and shifting.  You are adapting your emotional foundations.  You may be sensing emotional uncertainly, discomfort or confusion.  You may be feeling vulnerable.  Your feelings and relationships are being challenged.  Old feelings or relationships that weren't resolved in the past may be re-emerging for current resolution." - Gail Fairfield

"A Cat's Interpretation:  Cats do experience loss of course, whether it's of territory, companions or simply the loss of prey they were hunting.  However it's the rare cat that seems to dwell on this for long.  A cat's nature is to forget and move on, and perhaps we humans could learn a lot from that." - Baroque Bohemian Cats companion book

Flux?  I don't know if I feel in a state of flux.  Although I do admit that I have been feeling a bit sad lately.  It's getting near my brother Tom's birthday and it sometimes makes me a bit melancholy.  I do love the Cat's Interpretation.  There is something touching in the reminder that a cat does feel the loss but doesn't wallow in it.  When her companion Chuchulinka was euthanized, Holler definitely moped around for a while.  She clearly missed the "big sister" who had been there for her entire life.  She did eventually adapt to being an only cat and now seems quite content to have our undivided attention.

Thinking about Tom at this time of year is both happy and sad.  I am able to remember the silly things he used to do that made us all laugh so much.  I also remember his fierce temper and his loyalty.  Remembering him does not mean getting swamped and overwhelmed with loss.  It means that I can remember him and honor him with love and joy.  There is still pain but it's more of a bittersweet pain.  I was lucky and blessed to have known him at all.  That his time on this Earth was cut short doesn't take away from the gifts he gave me.  And that's what I need to focus on - how he lived rather than how he died.